Wholeness is Liberation
Before I was initiated into my healing journey in 2019, I often saw the world through a lens of pain. So much so that a friend once said to me, “Why is your name Joy? It should be Sorrow.”
For years, I carried that question like a weight. It wasn’t until I faced the wounds of being a queer Black woman in the U.S. South that I understood the essence of why my mother named me Joy. It was when I learned to embrace all parts of myself, especially the ones that felt broken, that I rediscovered my wholeness. Wholeness was never about being perfect or healed. It was about remembering who I am and reclaiming my belonging on this earth. It was about learning to love the contradictions, the complexity, the pain, and the joy. And in that remembering, I found my liberation—Whole with joy.
This is what I wish for all of us.
What I needed from that “friend” was not judgment, but compassion, curiosity, and presence. And isn’t that what we all need? To be met in our wholeness, to have someone witness the depths of our joy and sorrow without turning away. We each have our own past, our own journey marked by suffering and resilience. And beyond the pain, there is so much possibility when we embrace our wholeness.
We carry both the wounds and the wisdom of our ancestors their joys and sorrows live in our bones. Yet, we have also inherited a world that conditions us to see through a divided lens: good versus bad, black versus white, man versus woman, right versus left. A world that reduces complexity to binary thinking, disconnecting us from the fullness of who we are. One of oppression’s greatest weapons is its ability to control us without being physically present. We internalize it.
We enact it upon ourselves and each other. But we were never meant to carry shame for our existence. Our complexity is our power. It is what makes us colorful, rooted, resilient. The sharp edges of our being, our thorns are not something to be hidden or softened for the comfort of others. They are part of our design, our protection, our truth. When we learn to embrace the fullness of who we are, without apology, we flourish. The wounds of our ancestors will continue to replay through us until we become aware, until we choose differently, until we break the cycle.
None of us are exempt from the conditioning of the world we live in. It has left us fragmented, disconnected from ourselves, from each other, from the earth. This disconnection manifests as emotional distress, spiritual wounding, and a deep sense of loss.
But living in wholeness is a declaration.
Like the rose, we must honor both our thorns and our petals.
Like the night sky, we must embrace both darkness and starlight.
Like the shifting sun, we must allow ourselves to unfold.
Reclaiming wholeness is to remember ourselves as nature. To understand that joy and pain are not opposites—they are intertwined. When we honor the fullness of our experiences, we liberate our spirits. And right now, in these times, we are being called to choose.
Will we be healers or will we contribute to destruction?
Will we remember, or will we stay entangled in pain by a world that profits from our separation?
Wholeness is a choice. A choice to say: “There is more for me. I want to learn how to do my part. I want to unlearn separation. I want to reclaim my belonging.”
The Path of Wholeness
The systems around us have taught us to divide ourselves to fear who we are, to be in conflict with ourselves, to see the world through a narrow, one-dimensional lens. But wholeness calls us back. It invites us to retrieve the lost parts of ourselves and return home.
To reclaim.
To remember.
To honor our complexity & celebrate our differences.
To face what shames us.
To unburden ourselves from the mistakes of the past.
To say:
“I am not my pain.
I am not my trauma.
I am not doomed by the wounds of those who came before me.”
Instead, I choose to honor, observe, and acknowledge the past—
Not to be bound by it, but to learn from it.
To move from reactivity to conscious choice.
To deepen self-awareness
To understand that we are the past, the present, and the future.
And with that understanding,
We have the power to design the world we wish to live in..
Some will say this concept is naive, but it is quite the opposite. It is the work we are here to do. This work is full of grief. It requires humility. Reclaiming wholeness requires bravery. The work of wholeness begins right here, within our own lives, how we honor our own complex humanity, how we navigate family dynamics, how we love our children, how we show up in our intimate relationships, and in our communities. It begins in the small, everyday moments where we choose to engage differently, to act from love rather than fear, to build instead of destroy.
Whole with Joy: An Invitation
A space for exploration.
A journey of transformation.
A reclamation of our interconnectedness.
We do not have to choose just one way of being. Wholeness teaches us that every part of us, personal and collective holds wisdom. That nothing is ever what it seems. That our liberation lies in digging deeper, building bridges, and weaving together the threads of our collective story.
To say: “I choose this path. I choose freedom. I choose to remember.”
And in that remembering, I will transform my life. And in transforming my life, I will transform the world.
Whole with Joy is an invitation, to step into this journey, to walk the path of wholeness, to remember who you are.
Welcome to Whole with Joy!
I’m so glad you're here, and I truly hope this has offered something positive for your life. I’d love to hear your thoughts and any feedback you may have, please feel free to share in the comments. Before you go, I’d like to invite you to subscribe to the Whole with Joy newsletter.
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